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Talking to your family about your wishes for the future

03 December 2021

No-one likes to think about a time when they are no longer around or have lost mental capacity. However, planning for the future can put your mind at ease.

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Talking to loved ones about what you would like to happen in these circumstances may seem difficult, morbid or unnecessary. However it makes things much easier for those closest to you when the inevitable comes. 


(a) Starting the conversation 


It is difficult to bring up such serious matters without warning. If your circumstances have changed, it can be a good time to raise such matters with family members. Especially if if you have remarried, had grandchildren, or moved into a care home. It will seem more natural. If you know someone who has recently made a will or Power of Attorney, this can also be a great way to introduce the conversation to your loved ones. 


(b) Discussing your will 


This is an important discussion to have with those closest to you. What should happen to your money and property after you die? While your estate may seem straightforward, wills disputes are common, and you should take steps to prevent problems. 


Emotions are raw after a death in the family. People can be bitter about property and money. The best way to ensure the distribution of your assets is straightforward is to discuss your will with your family. Explain your reasons for gifting your property as you have set out. Some people might feel hurt by what you have chosen to do. However if you discuss your reasoning with them they may come to understand your perspective. It may avoid them taking offence that you do not intend. Or a difficult and embarrassing shock after you have died. 

Discussions could even help you decide what is best for your family. Talk to them making a will to find out whether they would prefer you to leave a gift to their children for example. They may prefer for you to leave matters in a way you never previously considered. 


(c) Discussing your Power of Attorney


You can make Lasting Powers of Attorney to appoint loved ones to help you when you can no longer do things for yourself. You can give them permission to help you with your property and financial affairs. This includes accessing your bank accounts and selling your home. You can also cover health and care decisions, such as whether you should move into a care home and what sort of treatment you would wish to receive if you were in a coma.

Discussions about hospital and end of life treatments can be upsetting, but it is really important to let your family know your wishes in advance, so they know what to do when the time comes.

(d) Choosing Executors and Attorneys


An important part of planning for the future is choosing who you would like to be responsible for your affairs after you have lost capacity or passed away. 


Attorneys

A Power of Attorney gives someone you trust the power to make decisions on your behalf if you lose the mental capacity to do so for yourself. You should choose a person you trust to be your attorney. The first step is to discuss the role with them and check they are able and willing to act for you. It is a big responsibility and can be time consuming.


Executors

Executors are responsible for administering your estate after you have passed away. This means selling your property and encashing your savings and investments. It can be an involved and time-consuming role, so you must discuss it with those who you would like to step in. You can appoint several executors to manage the workload. You may wish to appoint a solicitor to deal with the more technical parts of estate administration. Legal fees are paid from your Estate.


It makes sense to organise your Will and Power of Attorney now to avoid disruption and delays at a critical time in your life. 

If you would like assistance with reviewing your Will please contact our expert  Wills, Trust and Probate lawyers based at our Bournemouth and  Christchurch offices. 

Please note, this is not legal advice. It is intended to provide information of general interest about current legal issues.


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